Turn the tide..

And so I thought I had no school today, thats why I slept quite late last night, bout 5. But..at about 10 plus, my phone rang and my teacher say, sorry got lesson. :( Anway, its the 4-6 lesson so I still can sleep. And thats what i did...sleep until it was time for me to bathe and go to school. WASTED ANOTHER DAY.

I really just can't sit/lie down and do some proper stuff like my school work. After school I went to kino, alone, to see the price of a book that I feel like buying; Bastista Unleashed. Haha, its about...Batista, ya so its $46.01, thats like X2 of the price for what I paid for the shawn michales book. Anyway, I kinda like reading and buying books now. Haha

When I got home, I wanted to start blogging but Ben ask me to play dota, so having no self control, I played.. Haiz, waste time again. :(

Finally the Fall update for the Xbox360 is up. And the main features is like can play those videos in DviX format, haha that means can play those torrent movies:P And also we are now able to d/l Xbox1 games. Weee.. Games like Halo and Fable are up now, slowly more to come. But I'm still waiting for MS to released those video contents on the USA to be on our local region too. Oh, and I also d/l the theme song for Halo on Guitar Hero III. :D

Bye.

Hmmmm..(cant think of any now to suit my mood)

Quite full now, just came back from a buffet dinner at penang place. It is my mom's birthday, and as usual, I only knew of it yesterday night. Haha. Well, so far of my 19years as their son, I had never bought any presents for my parents for their birthday. :(

So...this morning when I woke up, it was quite a shock, cos my hands were clean, no blood stains. Haha, that is quite rare, maybe praying do works?:) But my face still feels idiot, and when I looked into the mirror, it is. :(

On my way to school today, I saw tianann on the same train too. Which brings me back to yesterday's post. Haha, I just somehow knew that I forgotten to write about something, and that something was Tianann. Haha, cos he talked to me on msn on Monday evening which made me feel better:) Thanks friend~. lol. And I'm happy that..(I know, you know, I know, those kind of stuff, won't say here) Haha, just hope that you faster choose me over Genn. ;) :P

I was at the library killing time before my test start and so I decided to take out my Bible to read.(After taking a nap) It has been quite sometime since I took out my Bible to read it for fun kind. So anyway, as I was reading it halfway, I felt like praying..so I prayed. (Wont say what I prayed about but..it sort of answer me) The next verse after I prayed and read was;

"Do you think it's enough just to believe

that there is one God? Well, even the demons believe this,

and they tremble in terror!"

Haha....... I think I'll repeat one module this sem.

Woot, tomorrow no school. But Friday I think I might not be going to Ian's place for the BBQ thingy, my project mates choose Friday night to meet up for project.

Sunshine after the rain

I actually wanted to do a back-to-back post but..guess not.

I wanted today to be a better day but it turns out to be half-way there only:(

When I woke up, my leg was sticking to my bed sheet. Damn, the blood from my leg joins with the sheet. Haiz, and my mun just changed it yesterday. Today my leg was super bloody, not to mention the hands. Luckily not everything was going that bad, I was looking thru the BoB forums and one thread about Xiaxue and Steven Lim was made. Haha, there were 2 videos and both just made me LOL.



!!!VULGARITY WARNING!!!


Steven Lim is damn loser, dunno what is he thinking man. Chicken pie. lol

Showering is also an idiot thing for me, cos water touch my wounds and ya..Pain. Anyway, school is the usual for me, nothing much to say.

Yesterday during my 4hrs break, I went to catch the movie; HERO. Haha, quite a nice show, well, I just love the main actor, and actress. He is like so handsome, and for a guy to say another guy handsome, means he really is. Haha, relax, not turing gay, never will. ;) (Sorry Ende, cos I think if you wait until your tests over, no more le. Haha. Other shows!)

Now is the stress period, where I feel...stress for not doing my projects earlier and stuff. Haha.

Finish.

Where is the love?

(LONG POST AHEAD)

Finally back home, on my bed ready to blog. Been at school from like 8am, but can't find a
proper time to blog.. I have many things going on my head since last night.

As I was saying, last night when I was on the bed, about to sleep, many thing were going on. I prayed first, then I thought about my life right now, then it just went deeper till I tear, wont say I really cried~

So from the moment I woke up till about noon time, I was just in a shitty mood. It was mainly just about 2 things; my life and God.

The life I'm living now I would say is quite Loser. I'm thinking what will happen to me if I did not manage to complete my poly. Then I'll think back the time when I got my JAE result, and I did not get into any poly. I was so so - depressed that I was about to do anything to get into one. I went back to my secondary school and got my form teacher to help me write some good stuff, things like that, and I went around all the 5 polys to appeal - together with Gordon. Somehow I've got 2 successful appeals, one form Nyp, the other from TP. Wow, so I'm lucky this time, must really work hard and not let my teachers down, that was my thinking before I started school in Nyp. And I even said I want to be the top few, thinking to myself, how hard can it be, cos I'm a smart person, just super lazy. Fast-forward to now, and ya, laziness won and I'm just surviving poly. Fail one module during my first year which led to idiot time-tables and having no proper class. From my transition of secondary school to Poly is quite a Hugh one cos many things is just so different. I've hardly have any friends at poly now, not counting those hi-bye kinds, from my Sec5 class or from church. I've always think to myself as someone who is quite funny but that doesn't seem to be the case when I first step into poly life. Although now I'm like having no fixed class, which means I should be able to make more friends..I'm not. Why? One reason, my skin. Now I'm at the point where I know what my doctor has told me before. That I'm someone with low self confidence, as he can see that I always look down, even when talking to people. In the past I would not agree, but now, ya, cos EVEN my face has it. And lets not get to my hair...

GOD! C'mon, I'm not feeling a single bit of love from you right now. I can even feel the love from my parents. I use the word 'even' is because, well I'm not the kind of son that says I love you to my parents and not to even mention good morning those kind. But at least I know they love me cos, I'm still here. I've like wasted so much of my parents money on ME. My medical bills is like - so much. From my skin/hair itself is already idiot, and now comes my eyes. Now I'm even seeking both western and Chinese. There is still 28days left for this year, where You said I'll be healed. I'm waiting for it, but at the same time I'm so afraid I'll leave church.
Nothing can change this fact; That you are the one true God, and those who believes in You will be up in the Heavens one day, and the rest will go straight down to Hell. I SO believe in this...but..but.

How I wish I wasn't born right now, but at the time when Jesus comes back to earth. Then I would not go thru all this and just go straight up to heaven. I know I know, there is a plan, a reason for everything.

I've spend about an hour typing all this. The next post will be a better one. ;)

What good is a heart

(If you're not gona use it..)

Wasted the WHOLE day today...sleeping. My eyes is idiot again, again as in not the 'attack' kind where I'll go tear-ing and just feels pain when you open it, but it is where I wake up and I can't really open my eyes cos of the 'eye-shit', sticking my upper lid and lower lids togther. If I force it open, its damn pain, I'll need water to slowly tap on it and slowly open.

*Thank you Laura for calling me to wake me up but, I'm just to lazy and sleepy. Sorry;(*

Anyway, I got up about 1 plus to eat my *breakfast, then I sat on the sofa and fell alseep again. My head keep telling me its night time period. Dunno what time I got up and I went to my parents bed to sleep... I was fully awake at about 4plus, close to 5. What a shit way to waste a day.

Now I'm worried that I cant sleep by 1 tonight...

Tomorrow is gona be a lousy day. I have a test and there will be many time to waste....

Gamespot, just fired one of their old time reviewer cos he gave a game a low score, and that game happens to have ads all around the site. Got fired cos of his own opinion. Money money money..

End

因为我活在西界

(只拥有半个白天..) *Because I live in the west side, I only have half a day*

HAHA, that's my translation from the song 西界, by JJ Lin Junjie. Dun really understand his meaning of the lyrics but its a very nice song.

Its like 10mins to 6am, and I'm here blogging AGAIN. Haha, have not slept yet, dun think I will for the whole day. And I havent even played Guitar Hero..... I was watching some old Jackie Chan movies, and just surfing around..played one round of dota by myself too.(loser, but dunno why I like)

Msn also like no body to talk to, cos I know most of the people online now is 'fake' one.

Listening to Chinese songs and singing-along. Haha. I know my voice not number one but to me ok can le;) Most people should know that I listen to Chinese songs now but my standard of this language is like primary school. Cant read or write, BUT my understanding and speaking I think is still ok~. (at least better than people like Ian. :D) So somehow I can memorise the lyrics, haha and when I go sing K or what, I don't really need the lyrics(cos I cant even read them), I sing the songs thru my powerful brain. lol

Random, random..
I hate John Cena, I think the WWE pushed him long enough! Its time for HBK to win the Heavyweight and Matt Hardy to get some push man. And again, I can go long long long about what I feel about WWE. Stop saying wrestling is fake...if thats the case, then whats the difference between that and watching a movie. And WWE is done LIVE, which is harder to pull off than acting for a movie. Hope there will be another SummerSlam tour next year:)

My dad just woke up.
I was thinking of going to get more chapteks before going to CO, and if I should go early(like I used to) or on the dot. Chaptek is like quite fun to play, I started liking it only after watching a Jackie Chan movie, where he...plays that. HAHA. Thanks to me, the youth guys also plays it...but we kinda still suck. I can go all idiot when playing it, like saying...dunno how to spell what I say out also. Heh.

6.20am le, off the start rocking my house with my guitar playing.

A whole new world

(Don't you dare close your eyes..)

Haha, not really a new world, just a new month; December!! I think many people like this month, cos its the last month of the year and..I dunno, many reasons ba. :D

Quite long since I blogged at this kind of hour, like nothing to do now and sleeping is not one of the options. Didn't have dota action nor WoW :( Oh well, I have the 360 to fall back on. Haha, last night I started playing guitar hero again. I'm at the last part for NORMAL mode(uses only 4 fingers) Still have HARD(5 fingers!) and EXPERT(5 also, but harder) to play thru to really complete the game, and not to forget those songs which are not on the story mode. Long way for me man, at first I thought I'm gona be quite good at this game, but it turns out that I'm not really that good. Heh, and I'm better at it with the standard controller rather than the guitar controller, BUT its still way cooler to play with the guitar:D

Today(friday), was quite relax, cos I skipped the morning lesson(first time) but like dat, 4hrs gone, must use my pon-ing wisely le. Can only afford 85% haha. The reason why I didnt go cos was tired, slept at 2 plus, cos of dota.... I myself know that if I'm going to wake up at 6am, the max i can stay up till is 1am, ofcourse id does varys at times. Haha.

Den after school it was mentoring with adrian > Cell > Home....

(I think the viwing font is like quite small...)